Is Your Groom Doing Enough Of The Wedding Planning?

Is Your Groom Doing Enough Of The Wedding Planning?

When it comes to the practicalities of planning your wedding, how you handle it can very much come down to a personal preference. There are some women who might want to take charge of the whole thing, to plan the wedding of their dreams, but it’s a lot of work, and if you’re not content to slip into gender stereotypes, you might want your groom a little more involved, too. As such, here are a few ways you can make sure that he’s pulling his weight, and not leaving everything to you.


Being on the same planner

The best way to make sure that you’re both able to rely on each other to take care of all of the essential duties is to share the same planner during the lead-up to the big day. You can create a shared to-do list, and make sure that both of you are checking it on a regular basis so that you can narrow down the list of tasks, and decide what each of you is doing over the next few days. There are plenty of good wedding planning timelines that can break down a lot of what needs to be done, and when it might be best to do it.

Liaising with vendors

If you want to be in charge of the look and feel of the wedding, that’s all well and good. Things like wedding fairs are still very much women-centric events, so your future husband will probably not be too stressed if you want to be the one to handle that, primarily. That said, if you need to keep in touch with vendors and track them down to confirm orders to make any changes along the way, then make sure that you’re not the one making all the calls. It can be like wrangling cats at times, so it’s a good duty to ensure that you share.

Getting dressed for the occasion

Of course, you should be able to expect your groom to dress appropriately, picking out the suits and the accessories that fit the moment. Having a little input on his style choices might aim him in the right direction but you shouldn’t be arranging the whole affair for him. More important still is picking out his own wedding ring. The ring has lasting importance as not just a part of the ceremony, but something that he’s going to be wearing for the rest of his life, so you may want to encourage him to pick out something that not only fits his style (and your budget), but something that he will be happy to wear. Something practical, aesthetically appealing, and meaningful is the way to go.

Managing the list

This is something that you’re likely to want to do together, again, but he should really be playing an active role in helping you whittle down the guest list. You’re going to want to start out by thinking about all of the people that you might want to invite, how many people you’re going to have, and then think about who are the vital attendees, who might be offended if they don’t get invited, close friends, and more. It’s very likely that one or both of you is going to have someone slip your mind, so doing it together can help you fill in the gaps that might be difficult to do alone. You are likely going to have to whittle it down along the way, so don’t be afraid to set some rules on who does and does not get invited. Your future husband should be playing a big role in chasing down RSVPs as well, especially if you’re handling more of the actual planning of the thing.

Bringing the families together

It can be a lovely idea to get both of the families together to get to know one another before the big day, itself. You can make an event of it, such as making it the day that you announce the date of the wedding, but be clear that the intention is to get better acquainted with one another, and make it clear that it’s important to both you and your groom. Then let him deal with all of the planning of it.

As much a shame as it might be, a lot of guys are going to expect to leave many of the details to their bride to take care of, often because that’s what they’ve seen and experienced at weddings before. It’s up to you to have the conversation to correct those assumptions, if you feel inclined.

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